SQUIRRELLING AWAY YOUR DINNER

Nestled among the gems in the New York Times Dining section was an article about the newly minted British affection for squirrel meat. It seems to fit with a certain bucolic image I have of rural England--men in Barbour jackets shooting brown animals and then dutifully making them into pâté, a fireplace crackling nearby. In this case the animals are grey and it's less sport, more preservation. Specifically, Brits are gunning after North American grey squirrels, which are multiplying rapidly in the UK, crowding out the indigenous and beloved red squirrel and infecting them with the nasty sounding Squirrel Parapox. “Save a red, eat a grey!”, so the motto goes.

While the idea of eating squirrels may not be as offensive as, say, tucking into a guinea pig, it is not without its caveats. Squirrels walk a fine line between being rather cute--sparkly little eyes, lush fur, adorable muzzles, human-like control of their limbs--and decidedly verminous. They're not so different from subway rats. They make trash cans rustle to life unexpectedly and exhibit little fear of people. Often they are seen in groups large enough to require a permit. Enter sciurophobia: fear of squirrels (and my subsequent fear of its many message boards. The internet, like a dark, squirrel-filled park, can be a dangerous place).

Preparing a squirrel for consumption also seems difficult. The NYT article describes delicately that while there may be more than one way to skin a squirrel, none of them are easy. And then there's the flavour. The NYT quotes Nichola Fletcher, a well-known food writer, giving two different tasting notes: “their lovely flavor tasted of the nuts they nibbled.” Then later, "'a greasy texture and unpleasant taste' presumably reflecting these squirrels’ diet." Our own in-house connoisseur of bizarre meats had a similarly unsavoury squirrel experience at Fergus Henderson's acclaimed St John restaurant: "They were doing a squirrel bolognese, if you can believe it. It tasted like something a grade-school cafeteria in depression-era West Virginia might serve." Yum. I'll stick to nuts, pre-squirrel ingestion.

But I applaud the efforts of the squirrel activists, butchers, cooks and game dinner-party guests everywhere. Jealous Americans, don't despair. While I wouldn't recommend engaging in park-to-table eating with whatever is slow enough to catch in Central Park, there are many opportunities for conscientious, and exotic, locavore eating. Look for heritage turkeys, bison, rare bean species, Tennessee fainting goats (bred almost exclusively for being funny on YouTube)--all species where increased diner demand helps keep them alive, and hopefully better cared for. Shop Smart. ~ ARIEL RAMCHANDANI

Picture Credit: kthypryn (via Flickr)